#perfectlove

Gods perfect love has been shown many times in my life.  All I have to do is accept it.  I grew up with a demanding mom who I thought expected me to be perfect.  Therefore I had a misguided perception of God's love as a child.  I thought God expected me to be perfect too.  Somehow with my mom I could never be perfect enough for her no matter how hard I tried.  This is still true today. Later as I grew older I discovered that God's love was different .  He didn't expect me to be perfect like my mom did.  All I had to do was accept him and He would accept me just as I was.  In the last few years I had gained 120 pounds.  Each time I gained a pound my mom was critical as always, but God just kept loving me.  But last January 4th God did something different about my weight problem.  I had just given up trying to loose by that time.  He woke me up early that morning and put a thought in my head that I needed to go back to O.A. (a 12 step program for people with eating disorders)  I had been to O.A. before and had lost 50 pounds and kept it off for 5 years with His help.  I got a gentle nudging again saying you need to go back to O. A.  "But God I said, I am so much older I can't go back to O.A. I haven't got the willingness to work a program again.  But God, this will be too hard for me.  I weigh so much more than I did last time.  It will be too hard."  But God won me over.  I asked several friends on Facebook to pray for me.  I got 12 responses back of people committed to praying for me to have the willingness to do it.  Well 9 months later and now I have lost over 60 pounds and dropped sizes in clothes from a 22/24 to a 14/16.  God has been the focus of my recovery.  Through my recovery I have gotten a closer walk with Jesus through it too.  God loved each of us enough to give His favorite thing away(His son Jesus).  He had His son die so that we might live with Him eternally.  That is totally showing His #perfectlove for  us all.  We are all so blessed.  Thank you for sending us Jesus to die on that cross for our sins and for raising Him from the grave.  Thank you for the everlasting perfect love that only you can give.  Thank you for your patience with us Lord.  Help us to be strong enough to weather the storms life brings into our lives.  We know we can have the God Confidence that you can give us if we want it.  Help us to remember that with you all things are possible.   That is God's #perfeclove!

Who You Are: A Message To All Men

Who You Are: A Message To All Women

Been There, Done That, Loved It!

I have now done two online bible studies with Proverbs 31 Ministries and one Gap study.  My first one was on "Stressed-Less Living in our Chaotic World" it was so wonderful. I got so much out of it.  I didn't do the blog hop or the phone calls but I really got a lot out of it and learned how to give God all my stress and problems instead of eating over them.  I also loved the praise and prayer days that we shared.  I got feedback from someone at P31 each week asking about my concerns and letting me know that they were praying for me. I am so thankful to P31 for having that one.  It saved my life and helped restore my marriage.  The next bible study I did was their latest one "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God".  This one was so inspiring.  I really was able to get in touch with God on a more personal level and really started listening to what God was telling me to do.  I also participated in a Facebook small group on this one.  It was so special to have twenty something ladies in our group communicating and sharing our hearts and I was able to step out in faith and do so much more for God because I actually started listening to Him instead of telling him all my problems and needs.  I even participated in the phone calls and Facebook parties.  They are also very inspiring and were so helpful.  What I think is so neat is that you can participate as little or as much as you want to in their bible studies.  When our last bible study was almost over I started feeling so bummed out because I didn't know what to do before the next study started.  Then I was invited to participate in Real Life in the Gap - They Said Yes!  This is something that is offered to Facebook small groups during the time in between bible studies. This bible study was really great because they taught us how to dig deeper into scriptures to find deeper meanings of the scriptures.  I learned so much more. We didn't purchase a book or anything we just used our bibles and websites that have tools to use to learn more about the bible. I even learned to Blog Hop through this study.  I finally listened to God and started my own blog.   I got behind on the last week.  But you know what that is okay too.  They know that we all have many things going on in our lives and sometimes we get behind.  That is not a problem with P31.  I hope that helps you know a little more about how special these online bible studies are.  Right now I am in TN but I live in TX.  I couldn't stay involved in a regular bible study when I am out of town.  As a matter of fact my husband is leading a bible study tonight in TX that I will be missing. 

I hope you enjoy your online bible studies as much as I have.   If you are just thinking about it I hope you just take the plunge and just do it.  I really recommend the small groups they give you the feel or being in a group that you miss just doing the studies by yourself and commenting online.  Thanks P31 for doing such awesome studies.

Mary, Mary, I am Just Wild About Mary Magdalene

Well this was a great week when I learned how confused I was about Mary Magdalene.  I thought she was the one who was being stoned when Jesus said whoever was without sin should cast the first stone.  I don't know if it was because of some Christian movie I had seen or where the confusion came from.  I did know some things.  I knew she was devoted to Jesus and I had forgotten about the 7 demons.  Can you imagine what it must have been like for her to have had 7 different demons in her.  I can't even begin to imagine that.  One demon would be awful let alone seven of them.  What I also liked about her was she stayed steadfast in her faith and she continued to serve the Lord.  She was there when he was crucified.  She was with Jesus's mother at the crucifixion and with her when they went to the tomb as they followed Joseph there.  She came back with His mother the next day when they went to prepare the body and found He was no longer there.  She must have been a great comfort to His mother Mary because we see her with her during the most difficult times when she desperately needed someone to comfort her.  So I also see Mary Magdalene as a very loyal, and compassionate friend to Mary the mother of Jesus.  She was also the first missionary by sharing  the good news about Jesus that He was ALIVE and was not believed by His disciples.

Truly she was a special person!  I also thought it was important that when He called her by Name she immediately recognized Him.  Many others didn't have her discernment.

The last two days here in Whitehouse, TX have been so blessed for me.  Yesterday we finished our study on Anna.  My husband was working and I decided to take the whole day and spend it with the Lord.  So I went to my O. A. meeting,  a twelve step program for compulsive eaters like myself.   I was slated to lead the meeting and had decided if nobody showed up I would spend the time reading devotions that I would have shared in meeting and then  spend the other half hour in prayer.   So that's what I got to do.  When I got home I spent the day studying my bible writing my first blog post and praying with God.  The day was just full of really blessed time.  I called my sister later and we shared scripture and talked about the Lord and how we each were doing.  Then today I got to hear two great sermons.  I heard one about Jesus and his mountain top experiences in the bible.  I had never thought of Jesus having mountain top experiences but maybe he had them first and now we get to have our own mountain top experiences.  Then the next sermon was on our spiritual gifts.  Today is such a beautiful day again to be with the Lord.  I feel so blessed.  On our last post I said I had lost 56 lbs. but after my weigh in today I have now lost 60 lbs.  Thank you Jesus for being the focus of my eating recovery.  I know that through him I can do anything and without him I am nothing.  Hope you have a blessed day today.

More Like Anna

This is my first blog.  I have been struggling with God over this blogging thing for several months.  I am finally surrendering to God to do this.  I am not normally a writer but  know that through all things with Jesus anything and everything is possible even blogging.

The story of Anna inspired me so much because we knew her life had to be a struggle.  She lost her husband after 7 years of marriage and never remarried.  She lived her life totally sold out to God.  She put all her focus on God instead of her own circumstances in life.  I think that is what appealed to me most about her.  I am sure she probably had very little to sustain herself with due t her husband's death. 

My husband and I are going through some tough times and we are learning from them.  We currently live in a very small house with just two rooms.  We have no living room just a large bedroom with a large kitchen and a small bathroom.  I forgot though we do have a long narrow room that is an open closet/laundry room and has space for storage.  But this was all we could afford.  I have learned to be content here.  However, since we have been here for almost 2 months, the oven has gone out the window unit air conditioner has quit working.  We are trying to live on my retirement from teaching which isn't much.  My husband has repaired the stove with the part that our landlord paid for.  However, when the only air conditioner broke down our landlord told us to start looking for another place to live.  Wow!  My husband and I have been looking for jobs.  I put in applications to substitute teach all over the area.  He is seeking a job in the ministry while preaching and leading bible study at a local  nursing home.  At age 55 he surrendered to the ministry. The work he is doing now is volunteer work and we really need an income.  I have gone to training on one of the jobs in the area but was told I wouldn't be paid until Nov. 15th. since they hold out the first month's check.  I'll be honest any one of these struggles would have sent me in a tailspin.  But I realize that these are just temporary set backs and that God would provide for us.  I also realize that Anna must have had an even worse struggle after her husband died.  She probably had very little to live off of and had nobody to take care of her.  But her focus stayed on God.  She didn't waver, she didn't doubt.  She persevered through life's struggled and kept God first in her life.  I want to be like Anna in that way I want to keep my focus on God like she did.  When I focus on God and what He wants me to do in my life then everything else just falls into place.  I am also a compulsive overeater and God has helped me to release 56 lbs. in the last 7 months. 

Lord thank you for the struggles in life because they make me appreciate you so much more.  Help me to grow closer in my relationship with you even more.  Help me to focus on the wonderful things you have done for me in my life.  Thank you for saving me from my sin and giving me the grace you have given me when I falter.  Thank you so much for the peace you have given me in the midst of the storms of life.  Thank you for helping me not to give up or give in during the struggles.  I know that You have big things for James and I to do in your kingdom.  I feel it especially now.  Please help us to overcome the trials that come our way.  I know that the closer I get to you and the more that I do for you and your kingdom work that Satan will attack us all the more!  Satan you might be big and strong, much bigger and stronger than me.  But,  My GOD is bigger and stronger than You and He will be called on any time I need His help!!!  Thank You God for all that you are doing in my life.  I love You so much and I need your help daily in fighting off the enemy.